So You Want to Be a Gender Neutral Parent, Huh?

Parenting is HARD. There literally isn’t anything easy about it. You have to make sure they are fed, bathed and kept alive, EVERY. SINGLE. DAY. And then if you are feeling a little extra, you have to mold his/her/their minds to be as good of a human being as you possibly can. This is a seriously tall order. Like, Trenta tall (that is seriously the first time I have ever used that word).

In my mildly humble opinion, the fact that you are interested in raising a child in a gender neutral way means that you are ruling in the parent department.

So what is gender neutral?

Well, it’s as “simple” as it sounds. You throw out all ideas about what a boy or a girl should or shouldn’t be wearing, playing with, interested in, etc. simply because of the genitalia they were born with. In a nutshell, any and all things are meant for all genders.  As a parent myself, it is really important for me to allow my son to figure out who and what he wants to be.  Neutrality in my family looks a lot like offering both trucks and dolls; allowing him to wear dinosaur shirts and tutus; watching both princess movies and Thomas the Train reruns.

But most importantly, I make sure that he knows all of those things are meant for him. If he asks me if girls can like the color blue, too, I make sure he knows that colors are for EVERYONE. The messages given from me will help counter all of the other messages he will face when my husband and I aren’t around. Because that’s what parenting is all about. Molding them in the best way you know how and then sending them off into the world, becoming a hybrid of the person you helped to develop and the result of all their other life experiences.

Oh, and one more thing: your child’s sexual orientation has ZERO to do with the toys your child was playing with or the color’s he/she/they gravitated towards as a child. Don’t let anyone tell you otherwise.